Lesson 1
Reciprocity
The debt you never agreed to
The principle
When someone gives us something, we feel obliged to give something back. That holds even when we never asked for it, and even when what we are asked for in return is worth far more.
Why it works
Reciprocity is one of the oldest rules of human life. Groups that returned favours could trade, share food and help each other through hard times. People who only took were pushed out. That history left all of us with a strong, automatic discomfort at owing someone.
The feeling does not check the details. It does not ask whether you wanted the gift, whether the exchange is fair, or whether the thing you are being asked for is bigger than what you received. It wants the debt gone, and saying yes is the fastest way to make that happen.
The lesson continues with In the wild, How to recognise it, How to counter it and a Field note on the research.
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